Sometimes, it’s time for a career move. Sometimes, it’s time for more.
Here will be the place and time to share that move. Maybe it will move you too.
An update – it has been a while
When I saw that what I had been sharing was incoherent, shallow and often sprinkled with typos, was disappointing. Between a lack of energy and a lack of time, the writing got sloppy. You deserve better. Thus, I decided to pause for a while.
Lights
LightsWe had guests visiting a few days ago, and I was recommended to write here again. I have a site where I have started sharing our family adventure into the permaculture world, and the little I write is there. Still, here it is. Today marks the start of the cold season, the month of the holidays fanfare and the final chapter of the year. It is a national holiday for both my husband and I. For all of these reasons, it seemed like it was time to celebrate. Yet, as we turned on the Christmas lights for the first time in our family, it was clear that my youngest boy was having a severe allergy attack. He went to the emergency room at the hospital and was given medicine as well as an injection. He stayed there most of the day for observation. We don't know what caused the allergy yet. Most likely, it was something that he ate for breakfast. I made a nut milk and a breakfast bowl with several ingredients. You try to make the healthiest meals, with the best ingredients, and you can still end up putting your boy at risk. I can strip all judgement, but the fact remains that I gave him food that caused him harm. This is something that is really hard to process, and accept. Of course, this is an opportunity to forgive myself, for causing this, to claim ignorance and underline my ongoing efforts to provide healthy and delicious food at every single meal, and to discover what is the root cause of this immune attack. This episode also...
Jellyfish Stings
Was this another moment where I was about to go through something awfully unpleasant, but then get through it?
Spinning
This is all very new, so the research, while growing, is still not robust and widely spread. This is also very old, so it ends up aligning with the wisdom of our elders: sleep well, eat well, move well.
Portugal
Living in a pandemic was not only locking us at home, we were actually locking ourselves away from Nature, movement, connection.
Invitation to play
I will think of you, and your invitation, and I will be resentful.
Um convite para brincar
Vou pensar em ti, no teu convite, e sentirei azedume.
Intimacy
and suddenly we clash, as if wanting to hit our chests like a gorilla and, out of pride, yell “back off”, “this is my space”.
The ex
The crappy butterflies, the pink walls, the ugly lamps, the obnoxious painting, the broken kitchenware, the tacky cat sticker and cheesy flower pots. I hate them all. They all scream at me and tell me I'm just a guest, a passenger passing by. A temporary shadow in a place that belongs to her. The ex. She marked her territory, she's ever present, ever there with her smug smile. Every time I bump into that lamp, I hear her laugh. That witch-like laugh you hear in the movies. That bed, those sheets and curtains. The ex knows them better than I do. She selected them. I am in her space, designed according to her taste. I have slept, showered, made love, eaten, laughed and cried where she did. And yet, it's just objects, just a space. There is no one else here. She's not laughing. She's left this territory to occupy another one. The ex is an ex now. He's here. I am here. We are here. Let the lamp be just a lamp....
How to keep giving the same great childhood when you have two kids
And for now, we can’t say who got the better deal in terms of his first year. Does it matter, though? What we want to focus on is that moving forward, they have the best childhood possible, together.
Wasted days
Wasted days “Where are you going today?” I remember shrieking whenever my dad asked me this while I was growing up. This would often happen when I would spend a bit more time at home. He wanted to make sure I was living my life to the fullest, that I was getting out of the house and having impactful experiences. I had more time, healthy and energy than I will probably have again so it made sense to use that time of my life to go and devour the world, savouring all of its treasures. However, I often just really needed to slow down, process things, and rest. I wanted to do nothing. This question would make me feel pressured to leave the house or guilty and irritated if I didn’t. It is funny that even the language corrector on my computer is trying to correct “do nothing” with “do anything” or, “do everything”. No, really, I wanted to plainly sit on the couch and waste the day away. I needed that. I still do. No time to waste Now, though, there is no time to waste the days. If you are reading this and can and want to waste your days, please do. Feel guilty if that makes it even more enjoyable, or trust yourself that it is not wasted, it is a gift that lets you deal with whatever you need to deal and recharge for what’s coming. Back then, I remember thinking that I would one day be older and look back on these days with regret. Now, one and two decades later I can honestly...
Should we homeschool?
Even if it is just a few hours per day, they will still be under the care and influence of their teacher, peers and other school staff members for a significant part of their time awake.
No Noes
I always believed I couldn’t be a salesperson because I would hear “no” all the time. The irony, of course, is that I became a mother of two small children.
A tough day
Everyone is crying, I included. We can do this. Time check: 8:00.
When the toddler prefers daddy
You cook, feed, clean, entertain, show, explore the world with him. And then you get a physical and emotional push back or hear “daddy!” as a response.
My husband doesn’t help
He doesn’t help me with the dishes or with the diapers. I don’t help him with work. We do things together, we add to whatever the other one is doing.
You will never be the same
What caught me by surprise was the more subtle changes, the little polishing here and there, the little wearing from day to day.
We have a surprise – Oh, no!
The power of routines in babies livesLittle did I know how, one day, routines would be such a crucial part of my life. There ’s beauty in chaos, in uncharted territories, in endless possibilities. Waking up and having no clue what to do next, waiting to see what we are in the mood for. To travel to new places and explore different samples of the world and human wonders.Becoming a mother changed this lifestyle, of course. For a baby, everything is new and easily overwhelming. I am often amazed at their resilience, at their courage to experience something ever-changing, ever new. Even the same place feels different as they can see more, hear more, notice more things. It is incredible.But to manage all of these adventures, their own bodies and brains developing at an incredible speed, and an increasing level of awareness, there’s something we can do to help. And that support is to provide, as much as possible, a steady, reliable environment. This, to our family, means avoiding changing the rooms as little as possible (sounds, smells, the location of toys and furniture, etc.), interacting with a few close people during the first months, and providing as much predictability as possible. Here enters the need for routines.The baby has no control over what’s happening, he can only show disagreement or express his feelings to a very basic extent. He cannot tell you much, and he can decide even less. So, just imagine for a second: your body keeps changing, your mind and perception keep changing, the world around you looks giant, strange and completely different all the time....
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