The Law of Contradiction
The baby is growing and is now the size of a ladybird. How awesome is that? A lot of things are being created and it just feels like a miracle. So many little things happening at the same time, orchestrated by Nature and fuelled by my own body.
It’s quite surreal but at the same time, whoever I see is the result of that same process. Everyone who ever existed and those who are now alive have been a part of this process. It’s unbelievable.
In the meantime, there’s not much more to report. I’m super tired and just want to sleep the whole time. Unfortunately when I actually try to sleep during the day, nothing happens. I just look at nothingness before giving in to the mobile phone, spending time and eye balls on… can’t even remember on what 🙂
Nausea is always there; but at least I’m not vomiting. Oh, yes, now we are happy that we are not vomiting. My husband is being super patient and helpful in my low energy and “meh” mood; on top of it, he is super excited about the baby and the whole experience – I think, maybe, he’d be happy to get some of my symptoms to share the experience even more. We are so fortunate.
I’ve been reading and researching a lot about the baby, how to prepare, what to expect and so on. One thing is for sure: it’s a jungle out there. On any given topic, for every piece of information saying “X”, there’s another saying “definitely not X”. There’s just soooo much contradiction. I call this the Law of Contradiction.
What is worse, people are understandably very passionate. Unfortunately, that often seems to derail into harsh criticism and disrespect for other parents and opinions. There’s a bit of everything, From calling someone insensitive to unhumane and monster. You think twice before saying out loud what you think. Yes, maybe I have slept on my right side while pregnant, let’s just chill for a moment, now.
All of this makes me a bit anxious. I am looking forwards to meeting the baby at the doctor’s appointment. Hopefully, we’ll get the first signals that the baby is healthy and getting s/he needs.
To deal with it, meditation and visualisation are good friends and allies. I’m just getting to know these two worlds, though.
Still, there’s something comforting and enabling about just sitting down, dealing with whatever comes up. It’s hard not to judge those thoughts, though. However, once you get a hang of it, it becomes quite liberating. On top of it, imagining and wishing for the baby to be happy, healthy and with two loving parents just lifts my spirits.
If, like me, you come from a background of science and mild scepticism, a great book to see how Meditation works from a Neuroscience perspective is Buddha’s Brain. Regarding Visualisation, Creative Visualization has been an easy read and a good jump-start to learn more about this topic.