Week 38: The Bells of Birth
The bells of birth are tolling
Week 38: The baby is now the size of a big bell
It also feels a little scary. I must be anxious. There are a lot of “what if’s” going on in my mind: if the baby is moving too much or too little, if I am eating/drinking/moving/sleeping well. All of this is, of course, affecting how I eat, drink, move and sleep and not necessarily in the best way. In reality, I wish I knew the baby is well and everything will be okay. And I kind of feel that is the case.
Still, there’s another human baked and ready to come into this world by exiting my body. This phenomenon is, no matter how I try to look at it, unimaginable. Sure, women have been doing it all around the world, for a long time – myself included. However, these rationalisations don’t make it any less vertiginous or overwhelming.
No Bells and Whistles
My husband is now working from home, trying to help as much as he can splitting himself, between work and taking care of our boy. It is now quite difficult for me to do simple things as to lift him up or hold him back if he’s up to something dangerous, for example. Besides, I really might get into labour at any point now.
This arrangement, while excellent for our boy and me, is quite challenging for him. It is hard to stay focused on anything, it’s draining, and I wish it weren’t necessary. He seems very happy to do it, but I know it doesn’t come easy. At some point, I hope to find a way to make him feel genuinely appreciated and celebrated for all his fantastic support.
Bells of Change
Everything is changing and supporting each other will be essential make it a smooth adaptation for our family. I know we can do this, we both know it. What is uncertain is how we are going to do it and how will our family evolve. How will a typical day look like in a year from now? Will there even be a typical day?
We now navigate our days preserving our boy’s routine but having none for ourselves. It works for now, as a transition period, but I look forward to us spending less energy figuring out what to do, where and when. With another baby in the mix, this will surely be beneficial to all of us.
Either way, there are only things to be happy and excited about at the moment. It might be a roller coaster but it is an incredible ride, and in the best company I could have ever imagined.