Two under two, first impressions

One plus one equals four

Our second baby has joined and transformed our family. It has been an incredible change, and he immediately found his place and made it his. I can remember life as a family of three, but it already feels like an alien, far away concept. We are four, and it is such a fundamental reality that I now can’t imagine it any other way.

This incredible feeling doesn’t mean it has been a smooth, easy sailing though. Our older boy is very excited about his baby brother but is too young to comprehend many things, including how to touch a baby or why mummy or daddy keep interrupting their play to check on him. He has been a champion though, dealing with all of this in a good mood, despite the incredible impact this has had on him. On top of it, several teeth are now popping up under the gums, and it’s just tough to deal with it all.

For us, the parents, it also requires a colossal adaptation. There’s less downtime, a lot to learn, and a whole new person to love and care for at all times. Sure, it is excellent. It is also time and energy consuming. As we didn’t have much of either, to begin with, it is a challenge at times. The happiness, though, makes it all much easier to deal with, and worth it. I, for sure, managed to become an even happier woman than I already was.

Two Recovering

My body is still melting back to what it was – it has been a mere couple of weeks since the birth. I am self-conscious, even if I know my body – I! – have been able to create and bring to this world a beautiful, healthy baby. These changes in my body are a sign of it. Simply put, they are badges of honour and pride. Still, I am looking forward to having my strength back and my belly circumference reduced.

Hormones are also going up and down, making me tired and dizzy. Some feelings of incompetence now and then, but mostly, I am doing very well and recovering quickly.

My husband is now at home, on leave from work. He is helping non-stop, bonding a lot with both sons and being an incredible man. Not surprising, but still amazing. I am and have been for a while, in awe of his generosity and love. His energy levels could also be higher, but he is content. And smiles, as I look at him now, while baking his special, entirely homemade bread. He enjoys nourishing our family, in all possible ways.

What about phase two?

Our main concern at the moment, or mine at least, is how are we going to do when he’s back to work. Can I cope with both of them? How? Do I have the ability to make them both feel loved, cared for and keep them well feed and rested? Is this the minimum one can ask for or a gold standard to strive for? We both have our hands full most of the day so how will I alone provide them both with what they need? And remain sane. Admittedly, we’ll make it work, and it will be fine. I am curious and excited about it. But not knowing how it is going to look like makes me worried. It is one thing not to see how a critical project will get done – that’s a lot of fun! – but another one not to know how you’ll make sure the people you love the most are well.

In essence, it is still too early days to know what having two young sons – two under two, they call it – is like.