Week 34 – Basketball Hoop
Topping it off
Week 34! Tasty realisations
“It has never been more clear to me how my body is, how my mind is and what we need.”
I started by going to the clinic. Then, a nurse took my blood, weight and blood pressure and said I was fine. Afterwards, I waited, talked to a doctor, had the ultrasound and was told I was tired but fine and that the baby was good. Finally, another doctor looked at my results and told me my blood sugar and diet was fine.
And, after all that, I went to the Pilates studio for some structural integration to help with the back and pregnancy and my instructor said I was fine.
The thing is, they could all have asked me. I knew how I was and I knew how my baby was. It would have saved a lot of time, energy and resources from everyone. It has never been more clear to me how my body is, how my mind is and what we need. Me, to some extent my husband and our baby.
Of course, I understand – it’s great to go to the doctor, track things, have the reassurance that everything is going well. And, if something is off, it can be very beneficial to know and do something about it. I’m all in for health care for everyone, I wish it was a human right, easily accessible and within reach to everyone.
Having said that, this time it all felt unnecessary. More than that, it felt like I was telling my body that I was ignoring the clear reports letting me know that all is well. Almost as if I was saying I didn’t trust my own body. And, for once, more than ever, I do. I really do. And it’s quite amazing. Yes, it is an amazing privilege and I am grateful I get to experience this health care and condition here. Not only it exists but I can also afford it. I’m lucky. But it is also quite incredible to have a direct line with what’s going on inside me. For a long time, I wasn’t able to tell if I was tired, thirsty, sick, at the limit of my mental energy or angry. I just wasn’t trying to listen and I wouldn’t be able to, anyway.
I wonder what changed. Was it the warning signs, when my body shut down and collapsed in the street a couple of years ago? Or maybe it was meeting the best husband I could have asked for? Perhaps it was Pilates? Or leaving my job? Being pregnant? Most likely, it was a bit of all this, one thing adding to another. Either way, I hope this skill, this gift, remains. And that it will be extended to our boy, once he’s born.
But I diverge, this post is supposed to be about the pregnancy update for the week. Daddy, baby and mommy are all good. The baby is now the size of a basketball hoop, almost ready to score. Everything is progressing well towards the birth and the due date is getting closer and closer. He is getting more and more interactive in my belly, it’s getting tighter in there as well. I feel like we are already bonding quite a lot, even the daddy. Still, I can’t wait to meet him face to face, look at his wonderful face and have our first family hug.