Expand and let go
What a good session today.
It made me laugh and it almost made me cry. I got to stretch and feel a bit taller and looser on the bones, particularly on the spine.
In most exercises, it’s important to not contract your muscles. Instead, you rather focus on expanding them. More than that, you want to let go of all the pieces of your body that are holding on to something. In my case, it tends to be the hips and that space on the back, right below the rib cage. There are other spots but these two are the usual suspects that have an impact from the most basic to the most advanced movements.
Today was one of those days where the hips were finally giving in a little and it felt great. I could move better and further. It also felt like fresh mint had been rubbed on the top of my legs. Unfortunately, it was not enough to make the exercise properly. I had just eased them a little – there was way more to go.
My trainer patiently helped me to expand a bit more and the rush of emotions was, once again, overwhelming. There’s that split moment where it feels like my legs are going to detach and fall of the rest of the body. Although there’s place between the pelvis and the rib cage that seems to consist of two little strings that holds them. In fact, they seem to attach the hips to everything above them – they are the so calls Psoas. They are new to my awareness and I am not ready to trust them yet. So, instantly, I held back the tears, my hips and my lost sense of security.
The Psoas is a part of the Deep Front Line, if you follow the Anatomy Trains. I’ll write more about them but after extensive and ongoing research it has been found that – surprise, surprise – our whole body is connected. There are paths transmitting force and information everywhere. This explains why sometimes, if you have an issue with your ankle, your shoulder will eventually start hurting. The paths are defined in lines that can merge and fork in different places. They carry information, weight and everything you need across your body.
The Deep Front Line is the line that connects all the innermost parts of ourselves, protecting our vital organs and our most private parts. It’s your core, your powerhouse, your centre… you can call whatever you want, but it’s where you can find your sense of self-confidence, esteem and trust in the world and yourself. Does it sound cheesy and too new agey? Perhaps but try to really relax your inner abs, pelvic floor and diaphragm and you will see what I mean. It’s the most vulnerable place you can visit.
I’m allowing myself to go in all these secret rooms – most of them are dark and the ground feels shaky. I get the feeling sometimes that I’m just about to step on quicksands. However, I like the idea that if I get to know this place and shed some light on it, then it will be really comfortable and nice to be myself. I will rely on all these hidden places to face whatever I, the others and the world at large have to offer at each moment. That is a vision, a dream, that I’m happy to explore.
The journey, though, asks a lot of me and it’s not always obvious that there’s progress. In fact, sometimes, I just feel a sense of regression – as if I didn’t know how to breathe or walk properly any longer. Of course, it is just raised awareness, not a regression – still, it feels like crap some days.
Today, I was able to embrace it with curiosity and humour. This resulted in some laughing and kindness – most of the time anyway.
Bellow the exercises made:
- Kneeling Mermaid
- Spine Stretch
- Chest Expansion Caddilac
- Tigh Expansion
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