Week 20: Spring forward

Welcoming Spring, change and beauty.

Spring back and forth

Week 20: The baby is now the size of a Spring flower bouquet.

The Spring is here, with good weather, sunshine and warmth. This season is delightful and genuinely makes my mood blossom. We are starting to feel the baby kicking just by having our hands on my belly. It is magical, and now daddy gets to experience it as well. He is here, growing, getting ready to meet this world.

I am also growing. My belly is undoubtedly getting bigger. I am also becoming more and more aware of how precious life is, and our family. None of this can be taken for granted, and I hope I am appreciating it and enjoying it thoroughly. It is the kind of thing one can read about, imagine, theoretically comprehend but it’s something entirely different to feel it so strongly.

Tears came to my eyes as I realised that all the different decisions, big and small, brought me here to this moment and this life. And so naturally I could not have met this amazing man, had this incredible son and enjoyed a life of beauty and strength in this place. And it won’t last forever. So here is, wishing health, love, meaning and happiness to our lives. May we enjoy our gifts for a very long time.

Spring Back

Such feelings and realisations, however, weren’t having much space to grow. There is a beautiful infant to take care of; we are still settling into our new home, I am physically drained and having difficulty falling asleep (hormones, most likely). Anxiety was starting to spread like little weeds in the garden. Suddenly, it was evident: just like a frog will enjoy springing out of the water and feel the sun on their skin, they eventually need to swim again. It was time to be alone, if only for a couple of hours.

My husband immediately dropped what he wanted and needed to do to make it happen. He suggested a whole day, a suggested a full hour away from the house. We reached a compromise and off I went. What a husband!… Hopped on a train, read a book, looked at the view and wandered around. It took very little time until I found myself swimming again in peace. There I was still, under all the roles, activities and timelines. It felt pleasant and refreshing.

And I saw my son and husband from a distance, I missed them again and say, crystal clear, what a lucky lady I am. And so I was ready to spring back home and hold them tight.